Below is the transcription for this episode:
Dave: What's going on, my friends, this is Dave Sharpe. Welcome to Wake Up Legendary let me lower my AC here actually worked out this morning. So, that’s why I'm late, why I'm sweating my ass off. Anyways, my friends. Always a great time to start over, you know, it's always a great time to start over so many of you are so worried that you may have fallen behind or something. And let me tell you something, that would be my, my health and conditioning right now so I actually on the old peloton bike this morning and got pumped up, got the old sweat pores, cleaned out, called the old sweat pour, they've got those babies actually moving and grooving a little bit but that being said, we've got a fantastic guest. She's smiling. Maybe she could relate. I don't know, ever fell behind on anything.
Kara: Oh my god. Yeah, yeah. Morning.
Dave: Good morning. Good morning. Now, just for pronunciation sake. Cara Khara with, which do you prefer, which is the correct one is Kara.
Kara: My ancestors would have called me Kra, because it was a very southern name but we'll go with care.
Dave: Okay, so where are you calling in from in Europe, Euro, you're also a, I want to say this before you bring us up to speed, you're a returning guest here on Wake Up Legendary so thanks for coming back I say that all the time come back and keep us posted, and here you are.
Kara: Yeah, yeah, it's really cool you know I'm calling from South Carolina, the low country I've actually we're in South Carolina but we're really near Savannah, Georgia. We're about 20, 30 minutes from Savannah, Georgia, where we are. So, you know, and we're right outside the Hilton Head, South Carolina too so we're kind of in between two pretty well known spots. And, and so, you know, coming back is really cool. You know it's telling that getting the invitation to come back was really exciting and kind of like perfect timing. You know how the universe or God or however you all, you know, call your call your forces in nature, I call it God but it's perfect timing because I've been really struggling with some stagnation. And just, that's just mental stuff like we talked about the last time I was on is the mental game of it and, you know, How, how important it is to keep all of this clear and going and everything and so I just thought you know what a great way to kind of like talk about it too and it gets helps me get out of my head but maybe I can help some other people get out of their head as well.
Dave: Yeah, I think that's a great point. I think a lot of us, myself included, strive for this perfect time. I was actually talking to somebody yesterday about another part of my life that I have really unrealistic expectations about as if I'm going to do it perfectly. And, you know, they're the only, there's two sides right you can either not do it or do it. Now, there, there is kind of a perfect way to not do it right, I can, I can just know that that's perfectly, perfectly done. You know, but when I, if I do it. It's never going to be perfect. There's never going to be a there's, I have yet to find in any area of my life ever to where I was absolutely, totally content and happy, and, and said, This is all this can be, you know, I have hit the top of the mountain, and I am just because then if I did, one might call that complacency. Right. And I've been personally complacent. as complacent, as I've ever been in some areas of my life. Over the course of the last year and a half, and I think that's just because I chose to focus on other things, you know, throughout the last 2020 and 2021 Instead of saying I'm going to get in the best shape of my life I said, I'm going to really lean into my family and my in my new son, and I'm going to really focus on balance there and, and, and, and I'm also going to be president in business and, but sort of as I said before, my health, suffered. You know some of my recovery stuff, many of you guys know I do 12 step recovery and that's one of the ways I've been sober for over a decade, that that suffered a little bit, you know, I think part of it was because I wasn't going to physical meetings and so forth, but But you You make a great point, You know, being stagnant. Does it mean that I can't do anything that I can't still show up and show out just because I feel stagnant. I'm going to feel stagnant, showing up and showing out, and there's just no easy and graceful transition to that. What would you share a little bit of your experience with that so we can understand what you mean?
Kara: Definitely, and you know it's perfect because it lines up with exactly what I was thinking, which again it's just sort of, you know, testament to the fact that this is this is such good time. Because, you know, I joined a network marketing company. I guess it's been 10 years. And I don't actively promote anymore. Although it's come up a couple times recently just, you know, hey, I'm doing this but I did that again too with a new mindset. Um, but it's in the health and wellness field, and I think one of my biggest struggles with that was always my consistency level with the health and wellness part of it. How can I promote this if I'm not actively doing it, how can I promote actively, you know, partaking in Look at me you know I put on weight instead of losing weight or I, you know, how can I tell everybody I have all this energy if I'm exhausted and feeling, you know, hyper critical, a little bit. Sure, but you also bring up a point of like, I, I like to believe about myself that every leader. but if you look at my actual action, and in my history. I'm definitely more of a Ruby. So what I mean by that is you know when I was doing the network marketing, marketing company, we would have, like, monthly events, and I would drive a couple hours to these monthly events and get psyched up. I mean, pump in everybody's excited and you know you go there and you're like, Yeah, this is gonna change everything. But you come home and routines are there, like, they're still there work is still there, everything that's still there is kind of is kind of still there. So the decision has to be made between, where am I going to make the changes that are necessary. And where am I going to be okay with what's happening right now, and then finding, you know how all that works for yourself and I get stuck in my head thinking that it's kind of an all or nothing scenario. So I've had to kind of struggle with those same patterns, even getting into this where this is much more. For me, I have found much more freedom in the ability to, like, you know, do the trainings and all that kind of stuff, it's been, it's been really cool to be able to plug in whenever I need to, but I also found that I got out of the habit of staying plugged in, I started to kind of lose that moment. And then I went back into the you know, even just the show right here, it's so crucial for somebody like me to stay plugged in and to really you know keep that excitement and keep that prior and learn something new every day. And, you know, gain little tips and tricks along the way and see what other people are doing because the reality of it is is that nothing is stopping any except for ourselves. Yeah, and so my biggest hurdle is what I deal with, you know, internally and the same old storylines and the same old junk that I carry around, and continue to have to unlearn patterns in order to replace them with new ones and I don't have an addiction story per se, to, to tell people that I've wrestled with. But I have to say that I, I know some people personally that have been part of my life, my, my son right now who's 17 is something that, you know, what I can say is that the path and the mindset of an addict, has a lot of ambitions, and so I can relate in some ways do where you just you fall back into these ruts. And you go. Yeah, see, I'm not good enough you see I'm never gonna, you know, and I'm never gonna look at that it's not gonna work and look at the, but all that garbage that you carry around inside yourself, and you have to get out of your own head, to get past it. You have to really, you have to really put yourself out there, like you said, the way to get out of the phone is to get out of the phone. The way out is the door that takes you out. Your only job is to step through it.
Dave: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, and I'm, I think you said it perfectly with the, I tend to either be all. All in. It's like all or nothing, I think. Yeah, you know, if I'm, if I'm not and how that might relate to building a business online or building a business as an entrepreneur, you know, something that's more work from home, where you have, you know, where, where all of us are obviously, obviously, would, would be in that category versus going and doing something brick and mortar opening a restaurant but, you know, we look at other people and we, we say, look at how good they're doing that as a form of being that is that all or nothing mentality, or we look at them, and then compare ourselves and say, Well, I'm not even close to that so I might, I might as well not even try. You know, I might as well not or, and I believe we should only compete against ourselves. But if we hold ourselves to an unrealistic expectation, which is my product, I hold myself in some cases to an unrealistic expectation, where it's just, it's impossible, it's never going to be that perfect or that good all the time, it might be. This is the other thing, it could be beyond your wildest dreams. And then the next month, it's not exactly yes then it's like was that a fluke or ocean is that ever gonna happen again or there was my there was my chance I did, or something. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's real, it's real, it's real, I think. I think it's a real act of self care. I think it's a real act of self respect. And I think it's a real Act of, you know, being in reality, which I think is another, you know, we talked about some of the, you mentioned some of the, you know, oh well I must be a piece of shit or I'm never going to, you know, I'm never going to be good enough. I think some of these pieces are just the human condition, you know, whether you added it or not, or whether you have this illness or that I think just the human condition. We all deal with a lot of this sort of self talk and so forth, but, but, yeah, you're here, you're on the show, I think, I think, in one way shape or form what you said at the beginning of this to kick this off, which was, hey, I feel like I've been a little bit of fun so this is great that I'm here. You know sometimes we ask people to come on the show and their responses. I don't really feel like I, I, I'm doing well with them to actually reward and and and have anything to say to anybody. And I think sometimes we miss the miracle, we miss the opportunity, because we're, we're holding ourselves to that unrealistic expectation. So it's kind of like what it's another example would be like we're looking for love, you know, maybe we've been single or divorced or something and a friend invites us to a party, and that's a great place to meet people and and instead we say no because we're, you know, Just feeling badly about maybe we put on some weight or maybe we're not really feeling are, we're not feeling at 10. Right. Five. So we're like, no I don't even want to go, you know, yeah, and it's a way to get pulled out of that is to say yes more say yes to the ideas that I have, because if you guys would comment in the comments and say do you have ideas, let me know in the comments if this is true for you, and please touch on this as well. Do you have ideas that you think of, but you don't follow through with, because for something in your head, you say, I couldn't pull that off, or I'm not ready to do that or I'm just not going to be good enough. Do you have those ideas?
Kara: Every day, every day. I mean, the reality is every day and I think anybody who's here has to at least have a tiny bit of a spark of entrepreneurial spirit. I'm so sorry I put my phone on, don't do it. I'm still getting all these notifications. Also, literally, like, I think that that anybody with the entrepreneurial spirit does a lot of those things, right, we hold ourselves to an unreasonable standard we see ourselves where we are and we see somebody who's at that endpoint, but most much of the time we don't see the inventory, we don't see the days that are parked, we don't see the days that you know you're rolling out a bedroom, I just can't today, like I just can't I don't even know what I would say to people, if I tried to get on online or on a talk or on whatever you know and and so the highs and lows, like you were talking about when I came on the show the first time because I reached out and tried to make this step because I'm super proud of it super excited. I had only made $2.80. I had made $2.80 but that took me from thinking it was possible to knowing it was possible, and realizing, you know that okay, somebody did the thing. If I asked them to do it. And I got something back out of it, like they said I would. And so that got me fired up, and then not terribly long after that, I wound up. I went viral on TikTok, which is known around the world. I can't even, I don't even know I couldn't even tell you, you know the perfect storm that created, other than again, I do believe in some forces that are beyond us, that you know kind of make things happen to give us what we needed, and so I needed that boost. I needed to see the reality of some things. I needed to see what was possible because if it had stayed, you know, under 1000 followers if it stayed, you know, right around 1000 followers. You know there's I'm the kind of person who, after a while, you know, it's like working out, you know you don't, you know, work out today Dave and see your six pack tomorrow. You know that's not how it works but that's why so many people go to the gym on January 1 and by January 10 They're done. Yeah. And so, it's, you know, it's that it's nothing that the results that you're looking for and those highs and lows are just part of, you know, they're just part of the journey. The first time I got a notification that I had made a high ticket condition. I cried, because it happened for me like it was finally real, and things were starting to come together. But I can tell you right now. I haven't gotten myself into a consistent position, to feel like I can step away yet from something that's safe here, and stuff like that, even though I say safe and secure. You know, nothing compared to what this business could do for me, but it's it's it's it's toeing that line between comfort and uncomfort it's towing that line between, you know, stepping through that door and say what's on the other side of this can be so much better if I just do the thing. The little things the workout each day. The videos each day, the little things that build up into those big things that are gonna flower. You know, yeah, we plant the seed, you don't see the plant until the season comes around, you know, any of those things are examples of what the long term can be, if you're willing to stick with it.
Dave: Yeah. Well, you mentioned the six pack, I literally have been working out, since I was late. Well, probably my early 20s When I was when I started working out, and I've never had a six pack. You know, I've never had a six pack. You know I mean, I've had, I've been leaner at certain times. Right now I'm the leanest I've ever been. And I'm also the oldest I've ever been. You know there's a lot of, There's a lot of things that, you know. Yeah. And, but I still, I still keep going. Not because I'm going to be the leanest guy in the world or not because I'm going to be the most shredded guy in the world. There's always going to be people out there that are more fit than I am, more shredded than I am, more muscular than I am, look better than I do at the pool whatever at the beach and blah blah blah. But I do it, I keep working out for example because I get a payoff from what I do, if I do it consistently enough, like say for example, 90 days, if I, if I work out consistently for 90 days which is a very difficult thing to do. Some of you who are workout, you know fanatics, you've, you've crossed over that hump, But that's literally, a very small percentage, the mass majority of people, which, with a lot of people think, oh, there's 2% of people that succeed in this industry and rest fail, and as if the rest of life is the same to there's 2% of people who have a gym membership at any large gym company. There's 2% of people that have a gym membership, that actually go on a regular basis, and are shredded in lean and fit 2% Right. Right now, I'm. I don't have those exact stats but you know what, those of you who say, only 2%. You don't have those exact stats either, so we're all sort of, yes. Right. But the truth is, that is, that is, everything. That is everything okay. 2% of people that go on a diet actually stick with a diet, long term experience results to probably, probably two to 5% of people in start therapy, actually finished therapy, go long term and experience true freedom from the trauma or, or the crisis that they were going through. Here's another one that I have personal experience with. I would say probably two-ish percent of people who try to get clean and sober that I've personally seen walk through the doors of a 12 step, Miss ground for a long period of time and experience long term sobriety. It's not just this. However, just because I don't, I'm not in the 2% of people that experience the absolute shredded muscular building. Does it mean that I'm just going to stop working out altogether because I have seen some results? And what I know is that it's not the gym equipment, and it's not the exercises that I'm doing that don't work, it's me. That's not working at all I think we all who have generated a lead online, or who have generated a commission online. Understand, if we're honest with ourselves, that the opportunity is there. Yeah, I'm the one who needs to change. Does that resonate with you?
Kara: 100,000 billion percent I mean, that is, That is the biggest key is definitely being willing to accept that because full responsibility for anything, whether it's sobriety, whether it's parenting your children, whether it's, what am I performing at my job, whether it's how my marriage is, whether it's, you know, my health and wellness, any of that full responsibility is extremely intimidating. So many of us live in that victim mindset of, you know, well, but looking at my day I'm so exhausted I just don't have the energy. The clarity or whatever and blah blah blah, all these excuses, and it isn't whether or not the excuses are valid. It's whether or not we're willing to get past that and actually do something different about it, is whether we're willing to you know to to do anything different. The only thing Jim Rohn says you know for things to change, you have to change. Yeah. It's that simple. And yet, how many of us have notes? I have a whole thing where I was writing down your thoughts in this conversation. And one of the things I wrote down literally five minutes before we started was getting stuck in dreamland. I love watching movies of people who overcome crazy obstacles to become great. And I love that storyline, I love that, You know that anybody could be a hero and Tality and anybody can step there. And I'm sort of addicted to it a little bit. The thing with it is, I get stuck there. It's easy to, it's easy to picture within a bubble. Because there's no work in a bubble. There's no struggle in the bubble, you know, you don't have to actively do anything when you can see it all in that bubble. I can see myself financially. I can see myself being able to travel the world like I want to take my children places they've never seen before, have the freedom to say, I just want to not work today. I just want to let you know I want to take a week off and go, go somewhere with my family, I just want to be able to go to a doctor's appointment without having to ask permission to do it. You know, I didn't see myself living that life getting from where I am here and doing little steps that have to happen to get myself there, and not the day in, day out, every hour, every moment decision that has to be made. The other thing I can encourage people with is, I've also learned that because my days could be exhausting, and having a family and having, you know, teenagers, where you just don't know what's going to walk in the door, per day and things like that. I can use my time wiser. I can use my weekends wiser and I can set up all my TikToks. For instance, on Saturday. But I also have to be willing to take Saturday. To do that, and not say, you know, I really just want the day, because it's Sunday. And so it's that it's finding those things, and then using them wisely, making the decision and saying, like a long term payoff. This is one day. I won't have to just use my Saturday to do this. If it's front end work for the back end.
Dave: And I think you described exactly the enemy, and the force. The enemy is being. Now, I would challenge you, you said, I'm not really an addict, but I believe we all are. Now this is just a little bit of a Doctor Dave here, so just forgive me, but, you know, everything I say is not medical advice and you could die if you listen to me so I'll just give that disclosure. But, you know, I think that's huge. There's a couple of really big themes that are not really kind of talked about right now. And here's what I mean is back in the like the, our, our parents generation, they mental health wasn't really talked about, you know, back then, you're an addict. I mean, they thought, you know you were a total criminal was still do have them, right, right, put you in the crazy house and just, you know, people, people would get locked away in strange jackets, I mean even going to see a therapist, he was like a shrink and you were considered a person, going to the doctor for God's sakes, was considered a weakness. So now, general mental health is like depression and things like that are becoming more kind of mainstream and we're talking about that more right addiction in it being more of an illness, versus a crime is becoming a little bit more socially kind of acceptable we're becoming aware but here's the new thing that nobody's acknowledging, is that we've got these things that are both the gift and the curse, we're addicted to these to social media, we're addicted just and I am to me it is a daily battle that I have to put up barriers and accountability and all this because I'm just as susceptible as anybody else. Here's the other thing. Being a fantasy addict. Okay, and you call it, like daydream and stuff like that, but it's, it's, it's been addicted to a sense of how things are supposed to be like for example, if we if we read enough books, or if we watch enough movies, and we begin to get primed with this when we're young, right. Yeah, little girls are supposed to be rescued by the white knight so now all of a sudden Yeah, we've got these predisposed expectations of what a relationship is supposed to be like and then all of a sudden we meet somebody and get married. And it's like, What in the hell is this, this is gonna be right. Because, what do we do, we go, we use things to escape, stop getting an affair. Some phones all the time, some are our reading addicts, they just escape into a book, escape into Netflix shows, right, never really addressing or communicating or saying these are my needs. These are my expectations. My wife and I had to spend our time together. We have a couples counseling session right after this. We do that every other Thursday. Just because sometimes we get unrealistic expectations. Sometimes we don't communicate our needs to each other. And so, that fantasy addict, right, and combined with an addiction to social media, you know, is a problem for entrepreneurs, especially because that's saying this is what it's supposed to be like. I do it, and this should happen. Right, yeah, yeah and it doesn't turn out like that and then all of a sudden, right, we start saying, it's not even worth it. This isn't working, blah, blah. Does that resonate?
Kara: So, my husband and I, we have been through a lot. We've only been together for 10 years but in 10 years we've been through a lot. And we're separated for some time, and we had to both be willing, that's that's a key factor, but we had to go to, you know, serious counseling, serious therapy, to be able to get through what we needed to get through to stay together and be together and get to the other side of that, but I will say this, like, I, all sorts of ideas about what he needed to do. Right, I mean, I can tell you exactly what my husband needed to change. But let me tell you what really happened. I had to take a long look in the mirror and realize that I was a huge part of the problem, because my expectations and he said it to me perfectly Monday, he's like here you get a picture in your head of what you think it's supposed to look like. You stay stuck there. And you're not willing to look at what it actually is, and literally just live with you. And I was like, like he's right. And that's just not my relationship, that's everything that's been my life. You know you get into a new job and you're all excited. And then after three years I'm like This sucks. What am I doing, and like everything that you know I get this, I do,
Dave: I hear shit most people get into after three days, right, it's like, it's fantasy that holy shit you know this isn't at all what I thought it was.
Kara: And I, and it's, it's such difficult things that came up well, while you were saying those things in line with as I said this little corner up in my bedroom we talked about. This is my Amazon reinforced because I got it off Amazon. And, yeah, and this is my little tree, you know that I got and everything I've set up my little core and everything but if I could flip my camera, I probably should because it's pretty depressing, you know, right in front of me is my bed. My bed right now has a massive pile of clean laundry on it that I hadn't liked for weeks and I mean, weeks because I wouldn't get home every day and I go, I could put laundry away, or I could try it on business. Which am I going to do. I could get away, or I've got to cook dinner and feed the children and get you know, get ready for bed and be like, What am I going to do. And so that's the other side of the reality that I think people are so afraid to. We live in this fantasy world with social media and Instagram and all this perfect stuff and you know I put on this, you know, but you know what, I wasn't in pajama bottoms. I wear pajama bottoms, Because you know. Well, yeah, but, I mean that's the thing. Nobody can see that so the reality of it is like what we see. And what's really happening are two very different things. So when we can start to reconcile that in our own mind, marriage is the ugly, sometimes messy, but absolutely worth it if you're willing to put the work in this relationship we've ever had because of the difference.
Dave: Yeah. I want to just transition right now into marketing because what we're talking about is, if we can understand the flip side, there's two sides of this coin. One side is to be realistic, as a business owner and operator in understanding my psychology, and I also. Now, I want to move over getting into customer psychology, and I want to use the things that work against me, right, this is that transition for, I want everybody to listen this very colossal because this is about to, if, if we can get everybody here in our community to understand this, we will. There is, there is nothing that will stop you. Here, let me try to say this as clearly as possible. So the transition from consumer to creator is where we begin to understand all these things that have worked against us, and we turn those struggles, into our strengths, and here's what I mean in practical, how does this apply practically. Well, I can create any reality that I want in my marketing. Right. I use these, this frame. Okay, that you see, because you're right, I don't see your laundry on your bed, and you don't know if I got laundry over there on the couch, you don't know what is around me and what the, but you know what, you also don't care, because what you want, what you want. As a consumer, is you want to be entertained and educated, you get the rest doesn't matter. You want a perfect picture inside of this frame you want, when we, when we go to the movies. Do what does the movie show the behind the scenes and ever know the movie is focused on the actors and the storyline and everything that's being acted out in plain out, no set mean that we can't be authentic. No, we're being authentic right now, what talking as a mastermind, as a community, how do we become better marketers and business owners. Well, we do that very simply, understanding the difference between fantasy and reality. And here's this plain and simple as I can tell you this. Reality is your life, and everything that happens in your world. When the camera is not on, or when you are not writing copy for your business. Fantasy is advertising, let me say that again. Fantasy is advertising. Okay, there's, I use this analogy a lot but I love Rolexes, I love Patrick Felipe's right, this is a watch called a Patek Phillipe Well, there's a, there's a tagline for this. Okay, they started using this back in the 60s or 70s, you'll never really own a paddock fleet, you purely look after it for the next generation. When I heard that, When I heard that bit. Right, that's it. I mean this is Harold, this is Aaron look right here, you know, this is, I mean, and so and so, the look, let me show you something. This is how the price condition and sell me the fantasy. This watch has a rubber strap literally in it but it is white gold right here but it's a rubber strap, I mean, it's handfish stuff. This is a Rolex, beautiful, it's even gotten diamonds. Okay, it's all steel, but there's a white gold bezel. The difference in price between these two watches. This watch right here is about five times more expensive than this Rolex. How did they do that? They talked about plugging your kids' ears for a second about dropping a bomb. Okay. they sold me a fucking fantasy. Okay, Mae sold me a fantasy. And you know what, I, why, because as a consumer, I love fantasy. I love fantasy. I want to go to the movies and be completely overtaken by the storyline, by the hero's journey. Right. I want to. When I watch a sales video or a sales letter, or I go in, watching an infomercial. I want you, when I give you a better example when I pull up. This is how I as a consumer want fantasy and love and go back for it over and over again when I pull up to the fast food line at McDonald's. I see that Big Mac, that son of a bitch is a perfect man. I mean, I'm like, Damn, that's the best looking burger I've ever seen. I got it in the box in the bag. It looks like a pile of shit, you know somebody just dumped somebody just dumped funds in sauce in lettuce and it's all over the place. Thank God it tastes good, because it tasted how it worked, I wouldn't go back, but you know what I eat, and then I, and then I go back up, you know, and I and I and I ordered another one, you know, this happens over and over again in my life, you know, you ever been at home at night with, with an infomercial comes on, and the guy does the chop thing and, or, I got sold the my pillow, you know by that guy that, you know, I got that thing, I mean, I was, I remember sitting in bed one time and I was like, oh my god this is the answer to all. I mean he just fluffed it and, you know. He's got the whole pips that guy. And then I got it home, and I'm like this is the most comfortable pillow. I've ever slept on, you know what I mean. But I bought the fantasy, and I wasn't mad about it just wasn't for me it was like cut up, right, you know, memory foam inside yeah it was it was every day though, saying I don't like quality and I'm not saying I don't want to get what I paid for cutting in the way, I experienced life, one of the reasons why I'm always looking for the next Netflix show I want fantasy I want things to be better than they are, when I'm in that when I'm in that consumer mindset, you know, it's one of the reasons why when advertising companies take pictures of things. You know, they get celebrities and they get the fitness person and they get, you know, you you buy the peloton bike I remember looking at those advertisements and the people just were so Sexy, Fit and all that, and then they bring it, you know they unbox the damn thing in my, in my, in my garage and it's just this bike that for several months just held close on it as a close, you know, because you have the fantasy that I bought in the images in the messaging was different. So here's what I'm saying that in order for us to succeed as marketers as advertisers. Okay, which, at the core we are we have to understand the difference between fantasy and reality and reality is our life, and that's running our business and that's all the things we've talked about not having an unrealistic expectation, it not needing to be perfect for us to continue to execute. But when it comes to us advertising, we have to flip the switch and we have to give consumers what they want, not what they need, what they want. Yeah, because what buys what they need. People buy what they want. People spend money on what they want. And that's why the world is as sick and twisted as it is, because people want to feel good, they want to be sexier, faster, richer overnight. They want to be shredded, they want to be a key man. Hold the man in the bedroom. The women want to be, you know, beautiful, and have the, you know, just, just, just dominate the room when they walk, I mean these are the things that we Why We Buy what we buy, you know, and so we have that in mind when, when we're marketing. I hope that that rant made sense because that is really my opinion. Ever since the beginning of my journey when I was broke and disgusted, Ted just got clean and was homeless. Not too long ago, I had to figure out who my inner hero was that I was going to be in my marketing. And when I sat down to write a copy to send out two emails when I got on video, I couldn't be the former drug addict ex homeless guy who didn't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of. I had to turn on that inner key to be what people want, which was, I had to sell a lot of fantasy, but I had to advertise and I had to market, in a way that we as consumers buy, and that is by selling people what they want. And on the back end, when I delivered my product, I gave them what they needed. Does that make sense?
Kara: Absolutely, I do thought but I did post my one of my tech talks to the Legendary affiliate Facebook page, just a day or two ago, and kind of called you out a little bit, because I said you know financial freedom is not about Lamborghinis and watches, and I said sorry Dave, but it's not something like financial freedom is being able to fill your gas tank, all the way up, and not having to stop it before that sometimes financial freedom is just being able to buy the groceries you want. And so I agree with you 100% And I think that we have to remember that the people that are out there that are our consumers that are whether you're promoting Legendary promoting make money online, you know, things like that just to talk on the show, alone, is to realize one, what drew us in, you know, the dream of financial freedom looks different for everybody. Yeah, I want to live in a really nice place and I want to have, you know, really nice things, but I want freedom to be able to travel. I want freedom, I'd rather live in a little house, and travel the world, because I'm not in the house all the time anyway. And you know, plus I don't love to clean my house, so I don't really want a big house because I don't want to clean it, and then Why waste money on somebody to pay to clean it. When I don't want to be there anyway I want to be traveling. So kind of defined. Excuse me. You have to define what that looks like, and then translate that into what your customers are looking for. Sometimes people just need to know, hey, I got the security, to be able to, like I said, fill up my gas tank or go to the gas station and not actually panic, you know, not actually panic when I'm running my cart at the grocery store and I've been there. And I know like you talked about being homeless and on the note of not having a window and not having to, you know, listen and all that, and close the video, right, there's, there's levels of it and so that fantasy, you know, is us as marketers, being able to talk to all the levels of those people, you know, and then the cars does not work for somebody who's homeless, necessarily, it just be flashing my grocery bag.
Dave: And you know what that would be a very powerful advertisement in the make money online niche. I think way too many of us is one of the reasons why I don't why I always try to stay close to the trenches. Never forget where I came from, talk to people, you know, I think a lot of people and in my position or whatever wouldn't bother to come on live and talk to our actual clients, you know, our clients are Pam's their minions that's literally what a lot of gurus think out there, they literally look at their clients as pieces of meat, you know as just, just, are they paying great if not move them on and I don't really care. But I know that for me to continue to be successful, I have to stay in. I have to stay very close to what it was like, when I first got started. And it's one of the reasons why I don't talk about extraordinary financial achievements or whatever that that frankly, I've been able to experience it over more than a decade in this industry, You know it's been a long time of of me doing this, but the grocery back is, you know, Hey, I didn't have to worry about whether mom's in my bank account when I wrote The when I, when I bought these groceries. That is an advertisement that would resonate with more people than if I went out to my driveway and said, Look at my Lamborghini, how it would just pull more heartstrings. And I think I played too many of us way too many of us want. And it's all or nothing. See, a few advertisements that go crazy out there with somebody with a Lamborghini and say, Well, I, if I can't do that, I'm not going to do anything, and completely overlook the creative angle, and the powerful angle of talking about things that every day people experience, like, you know, everyday challenges, like, yes, you name several right there. So I think my, my challenge to everybody on here this morning would be to use those exact examples and talk more about those exact challenges that people are facing on a daily basis, and instead of looking at one of the stories that I tell often and I never, I hope I never forget this because it's so powerful, is one that a client here in legendary share where he was able to buy his parents, dinner, you know, it was just such a powerful moment for him to be able to actually pay for dinner, and, and it wasn't, you know, buy in, you know, I shared a couple of days ago that I recently was able to buy my mom a car. Oh, That's fantastic. But this story about buying his parents dinner is honestly just as powerful. It's just as powerful. And the reason why it's just as powerful is because anybody can do it, anybody can do it. And anybody, anybody can relate to that feeling. It's hard to relate to doing big financial things if you're still feeling like the financial world is on top of you. So, and you brought up some, some fantastic points. You know we're coming up on top of the hour and remember I have an appointment here in eight minutes. Yeah, so leave us with some final thoughts, you know, we didn't even talk about your 50,000 followers on Tik Tok, and it might be different than what you think that's how we, you know, that's how we titled the show I hope we did I think we did, but maybe leave us with a final tip around how you've been able to build a following and essentially nowadays building a tic tock following is like building a list. I mean it's not an email, it's different, but it's a flip, I have a list of 50,000 people there that can advertise that a lot of them are going to send your videos when you post. How did you do that. How's that different than what people might think, just in a nutshell?
Kara: I think, in a nutshell, I would have to say that I stay very real, you know, and I think as that blew up. It blew my mind. I wasn't prepared for it but God was welcoming of it, you know, and I have to say I've gotten away from that a little bit. I stuck in the sales mindset, a lot of close a lot of videos about clicking my link click my link. And like we've talked about here, get back to the things that mean something to people, tell your story, share your message, because those are the things that are gonna resonate with people they want to know you, they want to see your transition from where you are to where you go, and because that helps believability, that builds you know credibility and people. The mindset part of it is crucial. I have to recommend the book Secrets of the Millionaire Mind by T. Harv Eker, and, and I need to link to the end, because it's overcoming, you know, all these self doubts and things that we believe. So I think that, you know it's just a continued growth of it, you know, it's, it's growing as a person that helps us grow as a marketer as a person, as somebody that people can relate to, as somebody in this community. And that never stopped growing. Even if you're growing quietly in the background right now that doesn't mean that tomorrow you won't blow up on TikTok, because you found a message that finally resonates with people.
Dave: Yeah. Well, keep on keep on keep it on keep on fighting the good fight and keep on doing you, it's, you know, you really have a powerful message, and a powerful way of communicating and you really can relate to so many people and I, so many people can relate to me included, so, you know, I'm really rooting for you. I'm so thankful you came back here for a second time you really sparked some interesting conversation. And so
Kara: When I leave my nine to five, when I believe my 95 I definitely want to do an interview so I'll keep you posted.
Dave: Well, I want you to, I want you to, you know, mail me, I want you to put the bat, you know, the, the bat light up there on the clouds, I want you to let us know, I want you to, I mean when when it doesn't even have to be that, see that's an all or nothing thing. Right. But I certainly want to have you on when that happens, but I see that I want you to continue to grow and know that here, all those milestones that you achieve are worthy of celebration and worthy of sharing, you know, and I think that's what I want to leave you with is some encouragement to, you know, yeah, that all milestones are they matter. They're, they're appreciated here, and by me, and, and, yeah, I want to have you back when you quit your nine to five, I also want to have you back just in a few months, even if you haven't quit your nine to five, because that may be, you know what I mean that that's how I That's reality. That's the reality, reality is that it's not going to happen on your timeline, it's going to happen, you know, it's going to happen at the universities or gods, right. It just never happens. But here's, here's also what I, what I've learned is that it's also never what I think it's going to be, if I try to predict the future, I will shortchange myself. So Kara: Definitely, definitely.
Dave: All right, Kara, thank you for your time. I'll talk to you later. Keep up the good work.
Kara: Okay. All right.
Dave: You see her, I see some people's and, you know, how do I follow her on tick tock, well her, her handles have been up there the entire show. It's Kara W Morrison. Okay, and that's Kay, if you're listening to this on podcast are something that karawmorrison and you can find her and follow her journey on TikTok, lift her up, comment, like, show your support. And, yeah, today was a powerful conversation worth a read, listen, because there were some real nuggets that were dropped. All right, my friends. We'll see you back here tomorrow. Get out of here, have a great Thursday, be Legendary. Peace.