Below is the transcription for this episode:
Dave: Hey what's going on Legendary fam? This is Dave Sharpe back in the captain's seat here and welcome to Wake Up Legendary this morning. We have an awesome guest who I just recently spent some time around. She was at the mastermind that we just had a couple of weeks ago. And yeah, she is from Ecuador and has been in the US ever since she was seven. So I'm sure there's so much to learn about her story there and what she went through and she was working three jobs feeling overworked. So she quit two of them. And that's when she found Legendary. So let's hear the rest of the story. Paulette, welcome to the show.
Paulette: Hi, Dave. It's nice to be here. Very exciting.
Dave: Awesome. I'm excited to chat with you. So where are you calling in from?
Paulette: California. So it's actually 7am for me right now.
Dave: So you were the ones who said you took the red eye with your Fiance.
Paulette: My fiance yes. It was really nice to get to go to the mastermind just gonna meet everybody and just kind of invest in myself. I think it's just very rewarding. A lot of people are a lot scared to spend money but if it's gonna pay off in the long run, and just leaving there just gives me a whole nother like aspect and like a mindset shift and just like opening up my world a little bit more, if that makes sense.
Dave: Yeah, totally. So say more about that. How did it open your world up more? How did it change your mindset?
Paulette: So specifically, like when we did the limiting beliefs like with a board that's something to me that's not like nerdy but just like a sit like more of a therapeutic session. Yeah, that seriously just kind of opened up my mind because one of the things that I wrote on there was just like, I feel like I'm not doing enough. And that's something that I feel like a lot of people can relate to like, it's like no matter how much you work or how many hours you put in, like you still feel like it's not enough and just kind of realizing that you are doing enough and just kind of believing in yourself and getting confidence. I think it's what it is like to be more confident about what you're doing. And telling yourself that it's enough just accepting that and just working through that and learning is just already so much of a difference and it just creates so much change for you like mentally you're for me as a person specifically.
Dave: Awesome, I'm glad you feel that and I think that for me and not feeling like I was doing enough, or when I am feeling like I'm not doing enough. It also comes from a deeper place of not feeling like I am enough. If I was to dig deeper, you know, I'm, I'm simply just attaching what I'm doing to my self worth, you know, but it really ultimately is about my self worth. And me just being enough. You mentioned therapy and therapeutic. I mean, is that something that you have been aware of working on self esteem working on feeling enough and do you also make that connection with the fact that you had, you know, felt like you were not doing enough do make that connection to your own self esteem and also feeling like you are enough?
Paulette: Yeah, so kind of goes back to like, when I was little when it came from Ecuador to California, iSo Mexican Spanish from Ecuadorian Spanish was very different. So it kind of got over me a lot when I was little and so I had to go through a lot of bullying and my parents kind of didn't know what to do or how to help me because they didn't speak English. So we just moved to a different city where I was able to kind of grow out of that. Like a lot of the feelings of me feeling like I'm not doing enough, or they go back to that feeling like oh, I'm bullied or people are making fun of me because of this move. I overwork or I do this too much and I'm gonna feel better. So that kind of does is kind of what I realized. And it's just working a lot on your confidence and when I started working out three years ago, like going to the gym consistently, and like this, the same thing with affiliate marketing, just being consistent. I just started to kind of work on my inner self, and like, grow through the process. And then finding Legendary just helps you grow so much more as a person. It's not just affiliate marketing.
Dave: Yeah, for sure. And I mean, I'm asking this and digging in you know, touching on that more because so many of our members come into our community and begin to go through our training and they want to launch their business there. They're so caught up in the mechanics of, you know, why am I why am I not getting results? Why am I not and when we look at what they're doing, they're not taking specific actions, say not getting in front of the camera, not posting enough in marketing. Not writing enough emails. Okay, well, that's a symptom. of something that's deeper. That's not the problem. The problem is that with that email, you feel that it's not good enough, with that video, you feel that you're not good enough in what you create is not good enough. So the biggest takeaway that I want all of our community members, all of our Legendary family to understand here is as you begin to go and build your business, the things that you feel are not going well, if you really look at your business and you say, Okay, where are the holes that it's it's not just, it's not always about just, oh, I need to do more of that. Let me dig deeper and see where the root of that is coming from and ask myself why do I not hit Send or why am I not emailing my list and if I can address the fact that I feel that my emails, we're not good enough that I can talk about that, and then we can get somewhere. But if you just say, it's like a cut or a sore and say it's infected, if the doctor just says we'll just keep putting a bandaid on it, just keep putting a bandaid on it, you know, just the same way. They will just email your list more just, but you never, never, you know, you never get down to the root and take the antibiotic or you never address the infection, then continuing to put a bandaid on it or saying just be more consistent is not going to fix the problem. We have to be honest and try to figure out where the problem is coming from. And that's why I love that you touched on your takeaways that were your takeaways from the mastermind.
Paulette: Also just kind of set in the year like wherever you're at like for me I started four months ago so I don't expect to know completely everything you know, just kind of accepting that you're on your own journey and just focus on your own growth and your own successes. Not just expect to like you know, people expect to pay $7 And then just make a lot of money in that like why am I not rich like because it's not or scheme it's not a scam like you actually have to work and learn and fail forward. What you say all the time, just fail forward. Like learning from your mistakes. Not a mistake. It's a lesson. Yeah. And I can really just kind of accept that. And once you kind of accept that and change your mindset to everything that you do as you're actually learning and you're not like oh, I'm a failure and I suck. Once you get that out of your head it’s just amazing.
Dave: Yeah, it really is. It really is it when you know this is the dynamics and the mechanics. I talk about this a lot and it's it's the image that I I hope to ingrain in, everyone's in everyone's head, which is, you know, the, you know, the image of the iceberg, you know, and the tip of the iceberg being that you know that you know that those mechanics you know, and then the the bottom or lower portion of the iceberg being that being those dynamics and those dynamics are what we're talking about right here those dynamics are you know, the psychology and the emotional growth that we need to have. If we want to really take our business to places and levels that it's never gone before with all the things that that many of us have tried. A lot of people have tried different things over the course of many years. And they start over and over and over again. And they, you know, continue to end up or at least feel like they're back in the same place over and over again. And you know, it can be frustrating. This is how entrepreneurship works. The 1% understand that there's the mechanics which is again for us the autoresponder, the software connecting the things it's the mechanical pieces, and in the 1% You know, the wealthy, the successful, whatever you want to call it. also address the dynamics and change within me to ask where my challenges really come from? Am I just addressing the symptoms? And part of the symptom solutions would be well, maybe this business isn't right. Let me just go start another one. And then the same thing happens over and over again.
Paulette: I've actually done that before. I tried to become a self published author and tried to sell books online and I bought this course before Legendary. I bought a course and was like oh you know make me money back and after like one month of trying I decided that it was too hard. And I quit. So it's just kind of funny because I can totally relate that to what you were saying. And I actually did MLM before and I didn't like it because the whole thing of writing everybody that you know no matter who it is just write it down on the paper. AAnd then you have to call them. It is so uncomfortable. I did not do that. I didn't like that. That aspect was okay, I don't know. I really don't want to bother everybody that I know and be like hey you want to get this and this is why you should get it felt like I was spamming them but in person.
Dave: And I think that's an example of where the mechanics just kind of suck. You know if your business I said this last week on a wake up show if your business the success of your business relies on your friends and family supporting your business, then that is not a good business plan. So you know that I've done tons of MLM. I've made money in MLM. I'm not here to bash MLM, but the mechanics of MLM, quite frankly, those mechanics anyway suck. And there are ways to generate leads online for your MLM. But yeah, so that's an example of bad mechanics. And quite frankly, though, you know, there's still that, that that kind of emotional or psychological barrier that we're talking about, even in that I'm sure you fell. Yeah. Which was like I'm not good enough or I'm not going to do this good enough. Right? Yeah, sure. I don't want to bother them. But I think after a couple of businesses, we ask ourselves, Is there a pattern here? And the first pattern is I'm jumping around from thing to thing, but what am I feeling each time I start a business and if I'm feeling like I'm never doing enough, it's never good enough. I'm not good enough. Then that's a pattern that if you address that, that's an example of addressing the dynamics. And this is when you, as an entrepreneur, begin to shift for you, the same for me, that now that I've addressed this work, I am enough and whatever I do is exactly what I'm supposed to do today. As long as I give it my best effort. It's enough. Eventually, I'll stop putting so much pressure on myself because that takes a lot of energy. And I'll just put the energy in the places in the income producing activities, and I'll press send it'll just be the best that it can be for that day. And that will lead me to success and that will build my confidence in eventually all it for you the same way that it has for me, you could take away my current business, and I still know with absolute certainty that because of the skills, both mechanical but also those dynamic skills that you could take everything away from me that I have today. And I would be able to start another successful business probably in any niche because of this work that I've done of addressing both the symptoms but also the root of my old sabotaging patterns, and that's how success is born.
Paulette: Yeah, I'm actually not quitting work, but I'm only going to work like one day out of the week, and I'm going to take a month break from my regular bartending job, that's what I do. So I'm so excited because that just opens up so much more time for me to set up like a schedule with my schedule. So like my stuff, I'll wake up and not sleep but she's on and off. But I'm super excited. To set the schedule like you were saying just set up a schedule that works for me and set up a time so that I can work you know, on my business and then times that I can just work you know, just my regular life. And I just I was telling Matt before this I was like I feel like I'm quitting my job but not really and just kind of doing affiliate marketing like full time which is super exciting for me because it's what I've dreamt up so long and it's nice to like actually learn like through the mastermind, just what was the limiting belief just kind of learning and focusing on myself and just kind of just keep going every single day and just being consistent and learning what what's working for me what's not like, what I can change what can I add? And it's just I don't know, it's just super amazing. I'm super thankful and excited. Yeah, I'm excited to be on the show.
Dave: Saying yes more, I think is awesome. And that's, that's one way to, you know, that's one way to grow. You know, first of all, because now you're more comfortable, you know and believe that you can get on the spot and do a wonderful job. You can deliver, you can speak, you can answer questions, you can be interviewed. You can also interview. So you know, those of you who are listening, this is a great example of, you know, if you if you also don't like to put yourself on the spot, you know, oftentimes there are opportunities where people will ask you to do something or there's opportunities where you're sitting in a room, like for example, I think you're in LA which you're very I'm sure aware of of recovery meetings and just recovery culture and you've whether you've seen it on TV or you have friends that are involved or whatever. So a lot of times I'll go to a meeting, a 12 step meeting, and they'll open the floor up for open sharing, and then nobody will share and I'll take it upon myself to be the first one to open my mouth and put something out there. Because nobody wants to go first. Right, nobody wants to be first. Nobody wants to put themselves out there first. But that would be a great example of a time where I will make myself uncomfortable, and there's not a whole lot of risk. It's not like we're going to lose income and lose our job, lose our home. You're taking a little emotional risk. And there's growth that comes from that. Now you know, that if ever there's a time in a situation where you know, where you can be the first or there's a kind of that awkward silence when you're sitting in a group with people that it's okay you can go for be the leader, you can speak up, and those are like the offseason, that's like the practice. You know, when somebody asks you to be on the Wake Up show, you know, often we'll invite people to be on the Wake Up show. And occasionally we'll get somebody who says no, thank you. We've invited people who have done well, down to the mastermind to share and speak and some of them not many, but some have said no, thank you and it's just I've never seen somebody who did something that scared them and after they did it they said I wish I hadn't done that. That was the worst thing. But I've heard a million times when somebody did something that they didn't want to do that they were scared and afraid to do. I've heard a million times people say, I'm so thankful that I did that. I'm so thankful that I went there. I'm so thankful that I said yes.
Paulette: Yeah, it's all about getting outside your comfort zone and just being comfortable. with it. Like I used to never go live and now I go live every day and I get to be like, wow, like I would never think if you told me like, Oh, you're going to be making TikToks and going live and posting on Instagram and doing all this. Like what? No, I would never do that. So it's just crazy the long way that you know, just coming just through just learning through Legendary Marketer and learning just through the mastermind itself is just amazing.
Well, you become an inspiration for other people who feel the same way. And I think this myth it's a lie that you have to have this A type of personality. This big, extroverted personality or that you have to have a certain specific kind of personality to be successful at marketing is just a big lie, especially in 2021 where social media is so prevalent and people are buying so much from other ordinary people, that people want to see that your real people want to know that you have insecurities. People want to know that you're being courageous. People want to be inspired by the fact that you're putting yourself out there I see these women who are you know, taking pictures of their bodies that you know, over the decades have not been the bodies that you've seen in the magazines you know, people who in most magazines in most of society and the ads look like they have an eating disorder. You know, it's impossible to be that skinny. I mean, for God's sake, you have to really be doing way too much or you have to have an eating disorder. And so I see women putting pictures of themselves in their bodies, whether they had, you know, maybe a pregnancy to where their skin didn't come back the way that it was before or whatever. which is how most normal bodies look, you know what I mean? Yeah, they're your little little love handles here, a little love handle there. It's unbelievable this dad but I mean it just keeps getting better and better. But people just when they see that would go back to the example of the woman who's, you know, taking a picture of her body in a bikini and it's got stretch marks so it's kind of stuff. You know, man that's got to be for the first time she ever did that. The scariest thing ever. But you know, what happens is I've seen tons of them, their profiles, they just blow up because people are so inspired by the fact that they're willing to be courageous quite frankly, because they're looking and feeling the same way. Do I have to be perfect to influence people? No. The more perfect I am, the less people can relate because we're all imperfect. So anyways, back to my point, which is that you know, not only saying yes helps to more situations and opportunities that are uncomfortable that will eventually not be uncomfortable, the more you do them. The second point is is that people are inspired by your normalness by your realness by the fact that you have human emotions the fact that you might trip up or slip up when you're talking and stumble or stutter or the fact that you might say, hey, I'm nervous, or, you know, it's just that is one of the most actually influential things you can do. Because people want to do business with people that they can relate to and that they feel like are like them.
Paulette: Yeah, and I think that people just want to see your struggles. They don't just want to see your wins or how much money you made. They want to see like, hey, this was hard for me, but you know, I did it. You can do it too. And just kind of just sharing everything that you've learned so far, because you're kind of taking your followers on a journey through your life. And I feel like just relating to them and I don't know if you know, but actually send up to on through Andre’s TikTok. And the reason I was able to relate to him is because he worked in the restaurant industry, and he lived in California and I was like, Okay, if he can work in a restaurant industry and go to bed at like, three, four in the morning, which is the same time that I go to bed like I can definitely and that's just kind of how I was able to relate with him and how I feel like I can relate to you know, other people that watch my content because I'm able to be like, Hey, I'm a normal person, or work you know, a regular job, I get paid, and like not perfect. Here are my struggles, these are my wins if you want to do this too. I just want to put the belief in people that they can actually do something that they plan to do, but just kind of just go a little bit beyond that and just kind of show them that like it doesn't have to be perfect. You're not you know, like you said you're not a model. You're just a regular average person. You just need to motivate them and show them who you are and how they can, you know, pretty much do the same but it's all about how much they want to change their life because nobody is going to go ahead and change it for them.
Dave: Yeah. And this relates to any niche by the way people so you may be thinking this only relates to the make money online niche or whatever but it doesn't I mean, it relates to whether you're in the real estate the you're talking and speaking to realtors, you're in dog training you're in you know the baby niche, some any other segment of health, wealth, relationships, anything this stuff all applies, it all works, especially in 2021 moving into 2022. There's never been a time where we want to connect and relate to each other. And those we do business with than right now. And even the people who we do business with at big companies, everybody knows I'm a fan of watches and I've got you know, relationships with with with salespeople, and the I want to know that they're a real person, I want to know, their family, their spouse, they I share pictures of my kids and I go there and hang out in the store when I when they call and say one of my watches came in or whatever. You know, she can make mistakes. She can screw up. We text back and forth sometimes. That is relationship building. And that is one of the hardest things admittedly is to be vulnerable in order to learn how to balance, you know, how much of your life you're going to share. If that is something that you have to decide, are you going to share pictures and videos of your kids? How far into your life are you going to take people but I think the most important part about it is to stay on message. If you have a TikTok channel for example, or an Instagram account that you're keeping on message if you are going to use different stories or show talk about different areas of your life. As long as you tie it back into the original topic. You're fine.
Paulette: Definitely. I just did that yesterday. I went to a cat cafe. I don't know if you've heard of those, it's like where you know with cats and all these cats that you can adopt them there but they've been saved from euthanasia. You literally just go and use it and these fluffy pillows and you hang out with the cats and you pet them and you play with them. It's so funny. So I literally just made a TikTok about that. And I was like hey, here I am playing the cat you know, like you can adopt them they're so cute. And you know, this is why I love working from anywhere in the world because you can do this from anywhere that you want to do and just you know just work wherever you want. So I tried that in just kind of just showing my personality, who I am as a person obviously like cats because I went to a cat cafe at the end time with what I do. And I'm like, Hey, you can do this too. You can work from wherever you want. You don't go to a certain place and work there.
Dave: Yeah. I love that. And I mean there's there's there's there's billions of people in the world who love cats. One thing that works really well is bringing your animals or your pets into your content and allowing your audience to know who they are. Your cat cafe story made me think of this. You have to decide those of you who are marketing into, you know, tying in your personal life to your content and so forth. You have to decide how much you want to bring your kids and I would be careful with that. I just saw somebody get an account banned because they thought that it might be because they had a lot of videos with their children and weren't somebody in our community. It was somebody else that I saw on social media. I would just be careful with bringing your children into your content. Number one, the main reason I stopped doing it was because I want to give my child a choice whether they want to be in my content or not. And they can't make that choice yet. So at a later time when they're older or they're adults they can make that choice. I'm not saying you should follow my lead on that. That's just a choice that I've made. I also really only do this show as content because I'm running an operating company here. If I was out on TikTok, you know, creating content as an affiliate and that's all I was doing every day. I might be different. I might approach that differently but what I will say is there's absolutely no harm in bringing your pets into your content. Okay. So kids much more of a I feel like a bigger decision whether you're going to bring them in your pets, no brainer. If you have pets, first and foremost, allow your audience to know who your pets are by bringing them in almost as characters of your show. Whether it's a cat, whether it's a dog, first of all, because animals do hilarious things, they just are funny as shit just They'll just be laying there and maybe there's so many creative things you can do with your animals on Instagram, TikTok and stuff like that. Second of all, it humanizes you. It shows that you're a lover of animals and I don't like it even for those who don't have a house full of pets. I appreciate people who do know that they are caring, loving people and it just lets me know more about them. Third thing is that yeah, if I do have cats and or dogs, and you have a cat or dog, there's an instant connection right? So if you are not including your dogs and cats somehow, some way and I'm not saying it's got to be in every video, or you need to decide how you want that but I'm just for those of you who who have not at least considered utilizing your dog as a co star you’ve got to consider that.
Paulette: Do you have any pets?
Dave: I have a pit and in no way shape or form do I think pits are bad or all pits are but my dog lunged a couple of times at my toddler when when she was over just and I don't I just think he was afraid in scared and just didn't know what this little person was. And so we didn't get to ship him over to grandpa's house. And so now he lives with my dad and is named King. He's getting old. He's got bad hips and stuff. He thinks he can do a lot more than he can. He's not accepting his old age. He's mentally young, physically old, but that is my animal. Notice that I'm the only other animal in the house.
Paulette: And it's like you're not old. You're just telling yourself that you're old. So you're feeling old and you're giving yourself those negative thoughts about yourself. So just like that, that's something else that I kind of just took away just to change that mindset then change the way that you think.
Dave: Yeah, and I mean I did an entire presentation if you remember. We are what we speak in basically the wrath of the newbie complex and how big of a problem it is. You know, I'm not going to go through the entire presentation right now or the entire you know, everything that I went over at the mastermind but you know this I call it the wrath of the newbie complex and you are what you say you are and when I was back working, construction and starting out online, I had all the same mentor limiting beliefs that most of us have, which is I'm just a broke high school dropout, you know, recovering drug addict, recently homeless guy. Who the hell is going to listen to me? I don't have any clout, no creds, no degrees. I have no business experience. I mean, I had some of the biggest limiting beliefs that that one could have. But what I began to do was I began to speak into existence, who I wanted to be in what I wanted to have, and what what, you know, I also was very careful about what I said in our house. You know, I made an agreement with my wife that we weren't going to say we can't afford something, we were just going to say, hey, we need to be more resourceful so we can get the resources, the money to be able to afford that. You know, I didn't call myself a newbie, you know, I didn't refer to myself as a newbie. I didn't call myself a newbie. I was very careful about how I spoke about myself. And I still am. Because when we say things, limiting things about ourselves, then it's one of the it's one of the you know, it's one of the fastest ways to embed that belief. If I've got people all around me who are saying you're a loser, you'll never be shit, I'm saying I'm a badass, I'm a winner. I can do this and I will rise up from the ashes like the damn Phoenix. If I say that, it will combat all of the negativity and criticism that's coming from other people. However, if I succumb to criticism and or negativity that I heard in general or about me, in the current present, or in my past, if I surrender to that, and I repeat that over and over to myself, well, I'm doomed. I'm doomed to fail. Because yeah, I'm never going to be more than what I say I am. I have to speak what I want into existence. And then my actions will follow my words, and that's when I can act myself and speak myself into a new way of thinking, but I'm never going to get there if I refer to myself as newbie so that's the number one tip because I don't have a whole lot of time to go over the entire lesson and the empowered self speaker exercise that we did at the mastermind, you'll have to come to the mastermind and experience that for yourself next time we do one. But what I would suggest to everybody is to stop referring to yourself less than what you want to be referred to as if you don't want to be a newbie, then stop calling yourself a newbie. If you don't want to be just starting out. Don't refer to yourself as just starting out. If you don't want to be a failure. Don't refer to yourself as a failure. Refer to yourself as what you want you to be in the future. Okay? So you're not a millionaire, but you're a future millionaire. Okay, so you're not a master marketer, but you're an up and coming master marketer. Does that make sense?
Paulette: Yeah, that's exactly what it is. And it's just working through that every single day and just catching yourself saying, you know, like negative things and just rewording them to change them.
Dave: Reframing, I can reframe a situation just by you know, putting it into a different context or a different perspective. You know, reframing is very simply exactly what I did with that example about not being so I told my wife, let's make a grid. We're not going to say that we can afford something. let's reframe it. Let's put this picture as the truth, which is that we don't have the money right now to buy that. Let’s put that out of this ugly, disempowering frame of we can afford it and let's put it in a more empowering frame of we just don't have the resources yet for that, but we can get them because we're resourceful. Final words from you to anybody who's listening, thinking about getting started with our challenge, or even our Blueprints in coming to a mastermind?
Paulette: I would say just kind of focus on yourself. Focus on your growth and don't try to compare yourself to other people because you're on your own journey. So just focus on your own journey and take like baby steps, if you think about the big picture and what your goal is, and you're going to get overwhelmed, but if you just step back and he said that's like your main goal and you set up smaller, shorter goals, that over time will lead to that main goal that you have. If you will get there just don't compare yourself to other people. And don't try to just think about things like, oh, not making any money, just focus on little changes that you can do and how you can improve every single day. So in the long term, you're going to look back and look at you know, see how much you've learned, how much you've grown basically, just putting that into action just blows my mind. It's pretty cool.
Dave: This is my dermatologist. I got to pick this up. I'm talking to you later Paulette. All right, my friends. Go follow Paulette. We'll see you back tomorrow. For another episode. Peace.
